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🚨 Donuts – September 14 2023


Happy Thursday.

new study finds that new mothers are more likely to see faces in inanimate objects. It is a phenomenon known as face pareidolia and researchers think it is due to high levels of oxytocin that make them want to cuddle everything. 

credit: giphy

In Case You Missed It. 

👴🏻 Senator Mitt Romney says he will not seek reelection because he’ll be too old in the next term. He is 76 years old. 

🔫 A federal judge blocked New Mexico Governor Michelle Lujan’s open carry gun ban. 

🇦🇺 More than 60 Australian lawmakers have urged the U.S. to drop the charges against Julian Assange who has not been convicted of anything and has been wrongfully held in prison for over four years. Yes. Free Julian Assange now. 

🌴 The U.S. Air Force is “clearing out jungles” in the Pacific to create more airfields. There is a word for that: Deforestation. 

🤦🏻‍♂️ The White House can’t explain the nonsense that President Biden has spoken in recent days. Again, do we call them lies when he clearly just doesn’t know what he’s saying? 

🧑🏻‍⚖️ A judge in Texas declared the Obama-era Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program illegal but did not mandate immediate action to deport children brought to the U.S. illegally. 

🇱🇾 The death toll in Libya from recent storms and floods has surpassed 6,000 people. 

🇷🇺 Russia’s second-largest bank will launch cross-border transactions in Indian rupees

📺 You can watch last night's full Redacted show right here














*Stock data as of market close, cryptocurrency data as of 5:00pm AM. 


The Lead: Now They Decide To Watch The Money in Ukraine?

us soldiers loading weapons for Ukraine credit: ap

The United States has decided to monitor how aid to Ukraine is used. After 18 months, this is the first time the Pentagon has undertaken any sort of bean counting. 

According to a Pentagon spokesperson, a special group has been formed and an inspector general has been based in Ukraine since August. Why are they doing this now? Congress has voted against an auditor after it was proposed by Senator Rand Paul. CNN reports that they are doing it because Republican lawmakers are demanding it. 

Will the Pentagon report on these audits to the U.S. public? It is clear that Ukraine is using Western-provided weapons to strike inside Russia, which President Biden assured the public they would not do. On Wednesday, Ukraine launched British-supplied missiles into Crimea, damaging two warships and injuring 24 people.

In other news related to the war in Ukraine, the Czech Republic has said that it will not extradite Ukrainian refugees to fight in the war. This makes them the fourth EU country that has refused to do this, despite Ukraine's demands that Ukrainian men of fighting age be arrested and sent back to fight if they are discovered abroad. Austria, Hungary and Germany have also said that they won't do this. Poland has reportedly already begun to comply. 

The CIA Caught Hiding Covid Origins

credit: getty

The CIA worked to hide the origins of Covid! This is an allegation of Congress, not conspiracy folks! 

The Select Subcommittee on the Coronavirus Pandemic and Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence released a statement accusing the CIA of having hid the origins of Covid. This comes from a whistleblower who they say is a “highly credible senior-level CIA officer." He accused the CIA of paying scientists to conclude that Covid did not come from a lab. 

This means the CIA used YOUR tax dollars to bribe scientists to conclude that Covid could not have come from a lab. 

Why would they do that? Who asked them to do that? 

Congress is asking for all communication about this, and if they don’t get it, they say, they’re ready to subpoena.  They also want the CIA COO Andrew Makridis to appear for a voluntary interview on September 26, 2023. 

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The White House Needs The Media's Help

credit: bloomberg

The White House wants the media to “ramp up their scrutiny” of the impeachment trial of President Biden. CNN got wind of a letter from the White House to mainstream media outlets letting them know how they’d like to spin this. 

A spokesperson for the White House Counsel reportedly gave the media this edict: “It’s time for the media to ramp up its scrutiny of House Republicans for opening an impeachment inquiry based on lies.” The letter said that impeachment should “set off alarm bells for news organizations” and that “covering impeachment as a process story – Republicans say X, but the White House says Y – is a disservice to the American public who relies on the independent press to hold those in power accountable.” 

That’s rich, given how much the media jumped right into coverage of the Trump impeachment hearings. 

Is it surprising that they did this or surprising that CNN told us? Before you give CNN any credit for doing this, consider this closing paragraph of their story: “The Republican House-led investigations into Biden have yet to provide any direct evidence that the president financially benefited from Hunter Biden’s career overseas." 

That’s not true. The judiciary committee has shown copious proof that the President benefited from overseas relationships in exchange for politics. They have bank accounts, text messages and deposit receipts. Sort through it yourself here

What's Trending?

credit: tiktok

This guy is trending for pointing out that the pumpkin swirl frozen coffee at Dunkin Donuts contains 46 teaspoons of sugar, which is the sugar equivalent of 14 glazed donuts. The recipe also has 12 mentions of sugar and confirms that this drink has 930 calories and 194 carbohydrates. 

These two drunken sisters are trending for freaking out in Newark airport when they were told that they couldn’t board their flight to Ireland. 

Nintendo Direct is trending because Nintendo will have a product announcement today

News By The Numbers

0. That is how many vegan activists went to a farm in the UK that they blasted on social media. The Gourmet Goat Farmer had stellar reviews until a vegan group rallied each other to give it negative reviews because it was an animal farm. The owner invited the group members to see her farm for themselves but none of them showed because they are what she calls “keypad warriors.” 

52%. That is how many young girls prioritize finding a house as opposed to 48% prioritize “having a partner or being married” in a recent survey

315 miles. That is how far one man swam to travel from the Adirondack Mountains to the Hudson River in New York City. He began the trip in August and finished this week, swimming about 10 miles per day. There is a Seinfeld episode about Kramer swimming in the Hudson River and it doesn’t end as well. 

Nickel and Diming Consumers

credit: getty

Inflation is down from last year but add-flation may be taking its place. That means that customers are being up-charged for every little thing. 

Restaurants in the U.K. are charging more money for pints of beer at peak hours, which some patrons say makes it an “unhappy hour.” Other restaurants are charging £2 for condiments such as ketchup or mayonnaise and £1.75 for takeaway. EasyJet was recently condemned for charging more for pre-flight check-in. It all adds up! 

This is why it is wise to carry hot sauce in your purse. Although I had two bottles spill in my purse this week and it was not pleasant. My sunglasses stung from the capsaicin. 

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This newsletter is written and researched by Natali Morris.
Please feel free to reach Natali at [email protected]
for any editorial feedback.